Horoscopes

July 28, 2010

From Jim Metrock:

I don’t believe in astrology.  I understand that some people do.  Everybody has the right to believe in whatever works for them.

However, I do have a problem when Channel One News offers horoscopes to children visiting their official website.

Children now can get their daily horoscope on Channel One’s web site.

Channelone.com homepage July 28, 2010

Below: Channel One’s main page for horoscopes. http://life.channelone.com/horoscopes

Below: I checked out my horoscope.  Thanks, Channel One News.

The problem with horoscopes is for most people they are for entertainment, but Channel One News doesn’t say anything about that.   That might be because decision makers at Channel One probably are “believers.”

Kids might not fully understand that what Channel One News is putting out as the truthful “facts” are just made-up stuff.  Channel One would like nothing better than convince children that horoscopes are important and that children should check their’s DAILY at Channelone.com.  That way they can get more hits on their website and their advertisers will pay them more money.

Many parents who are trying to raise their children with religious values would be appalled that Channel One News is suggesting to kids that it’s the STARS that control their lives.

Here’s a free horoscope for the handful of Channel One employees left at the company. No need to thank me.

Your friends think of you as an underachiever.  Don’t let them get you down.  Yes, you are a slacker who can’t find gainful employment with a company that doesn’t exploit schoolchildren, but you have other qualities.  You know how to get money out of children.  That’s a talent that many of your friends don’t have.

You also have an active imagination.  You may actually think of your company as a “news” organization.  That rich imagination will be of help when your employer closes the door.

You love playing tricks on unsuspecting children.  You know how to mix advertising with news.  You know how to get personally identifiable information from a pre-teen.  You know how to fudge compliance reports when schools are not watching your program.  You know how to mislead schools into signing contracts. (“What controversy?  We’re not controversial.”)

And last, you are loyal.  As your company continues to lose school after school after school, you still report to duty at Channel One.  Such loyalty is rare nowadays and this personal quality is admirable.  Appreciate your strengths and forget about your weaknesses.  Have a great day, Kiddie Marketer.

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